So I can't take it any more. Maybe the heat is getting to me. Or perhaps with my mind being preoccupied with thoughts of jobs and moving and all the stress that comes with it I have little or no patience. Or maybe I've been here too long and the romance of this life has worn off. Whatever it is, these people are really getting to me!
For example, (since you asked, here is the first of many....), Celia and I were coming out of the metro on the escalator this morning behind a normal looking french couple. I've got a folded stroller over my right shoulder and a tiny hand in my left and as I look up to step off the escalator, BAM! I hit the lovely couple square in the back. A quick, "pardon", French shrug (more on that another time), an annoyed look that I have done something wrong, and they are off. Yes, how dare I expect to be able to walk off a moving escalator with my young child, (or single or with 50 young children, I mean, does that part even matter?), without dying. These are narrow, tiny escalators with no movement on either side at the top if the people in front don't do their job. The job where you move away from the top! Who am I to have the nerve to expect to be able to walk off the escalator without having someone stop right in my way. I mean, who stops at the top of an escalator? Really? Where do you want me to go? Awesome!
Thus, this is my life. My rant for the day. I can't take it anymore and these people driving me crazy...
Another one of my favorites is the move where a group of friends or runners form a wall of bodies. You can't get around them or through them and they are totally "oblivious" to everyone else in the world. The fireman, (well known for their good looks and fabulous bodies...not so much for their running courtesy), take up the whole Montsouris walkway every morning during their workout run. Now yes, they deserve my respect and space and yielding. But really, do you need to run as a horizontal line across the way? Can't you all double up?
The wall of bodies across the stairwell leading down to the metro is another great one. How can you NOT be aware of all the other people in the world trying to enter and exit that same space? Seriously! Move! But no, something has come up! Should we get on the metro or walk? Go back to the party or grab some food? Is it time for bed or do you want to hang out? All this MUST be discussed on the stairwell, in a line, perpendicular to the entrance, thus blocking all reasonable traffic.
Let's not limit ourselves to the metro. I can do some good sidewalk trash talk....
1. There's the guy that walks in a zig zag. You try to bust right and make a pass at the exact time he's feeling more favorable to his right. Try left and ditto. You are stuck behind this zig zag genius that should have been a race car driver! No one can pass him!
2. Texting! Arnold made it illegal to text while you drive and we need his services here. I mean really: can you just pull over for a second and finish that message before moving along? You almost nailed my kid!
3. Which brings me to 3: The Sudden Stopper! We're moving, we're grooving, I'm pushing the stroller and then BAM! The lady in front of me decided to stop and text/answer her phone/look at the map/check out the shop window! (Okay, you got me here...I asked for the text pause. However, I did say pull over, you know step aside to a reasonable stopping point. Not right in the middle of the sidewalk!) I get nailed by the sudden stopper at least twice a day! (did I mention SS at the top of the escalator???)
Okay, so it's been a tough day. I mean, not really, it was fabulous. I dropped Elise at school, had a great run, and Celia and I headed up to Cimetière du Père-Lachaise for a great stroll through the cemetary before strolling through the streets of the 11th and stopping for lunch at a new falafel place. It was so so great.
But I just can't help but get annoyed with annoying people...
Am I going to miss this? Heck yeah! All my life I have wanted the urban experience. Who'd have thought I'd get it with a french twist? Just last night I got out with a group of friends for a drink and a movie. We watched Woody Allen's latest Midnight in Paris and relished in this amazing life. The movie was fabulous and was so fun to watch while living in Paris! It was so fun to enjoy this great movie of our own lives. Now granted, I'm not hanging with Salvador Dali, (Rhinocéros), or taking trips back in time but I am living in a great great city that is still great even when it rains!
I love it! And I know I am as guilty as the next guy when it comes to stupid decisions while out on the street. I'm a sudden stopper all the time. Granted, I've got two kids that distract and want and need and I have tiny excuses for being annoying. But who can resist the need to walk and text once in a while...
All I'm saying is I think we can do a better job of sharing this space. And for the most part, the people here are kind and caring and will go out of their way to help carry a stroller or help a tiny lady off the bus/train/tram. I've had a number of very positive encounters walking these glorious streets and riding the public transport. It's just these silly annoying space stories that are just too fun to share!
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